Saturday, 26 September 2009

What's going on here?

I've been in a tailspin weight-wise lately and I've been wondering why I keep self-sabatoging. (Is that a word??) I've been eating lots of convenience foods, I've taken up baking a bit (in a small way compared to my old days, but still), and I skip workouts. I cannot follow a rotation to save my life. To save my life! Since last Christmas, I have gained 6 pounds. That last 2 pounds of that have come on fairly fast, which means, I think, that my body is accepting its new 'weight gain' mode and if I don't get control of it now, I'll be in the next size up in clothing before I know it.

So what in heck is going on? When I look back over my year, here's what I see (in random order):

1) My hubby is on yearly contracts at the moment, so we don't know his employment status until about mid-year. (Next review is July 2010--will he stay employed or will we be moving on? Who knows!)

2) Work has been chaotic as the library service undergoes 'transformation'--a euphemism for cutting staff severely and changing everything, without anyone seeming to know what we're changing to. Those of us who are left have been picking up the slack left by those who have either retired or been made redundant.

3) My son turned 18 and graduated high school. Stress trying to figure out his domestic and financial situation as he started university. Now stress because he's already saying he wants to change his major!

4) A family reunion had been planned in the US for early May as a surprise for my parents' 75th birthdays. My dad died in April, so I travelled home alone for the funeral, then hubby and I returned on the tickets originally bought for the reunion, and stayed with my mom, who was very ill for most of the visit. None of us have ever mentioned to her the plan for the family reunion.

5) I have been taking weekly (and sometimes twice weekly) driving lessons and took my driving test in August.

6) Unexpected big ticket expenses have made a dent in our savings. Just a ping, but still.

7) I've felt bad about not eating well or exercising to a set rotation!

Looking back on it, it's kind of a miracle I haven't plumped back up to where I started from.

1 comment:

Anna Down Under said...

That's an awful lot going on Carla. Do you think that you've put others (or other things) before you in your list of what's important? What deserves your time? I know I do that. Work is so busy and I know the boss needs my time to keep this project moving along -- but the one who suffers for that is me, because I need my time, too. I need to keep ME high on the priority list and unfortunately I've let that slip.

Let's turn this around Carla, you and me both. Lets put ourselves back in spot number 1 on the priority list -- it's not selfish, I can be a much better wife and a much better employee if I've taken care of myself FIRST.

The busier I got and the more work absorbed all my time I felt proud in my accomplishments at work, but ashamed of my lack of progress (and eventual regress) with my health.

I have to find a balance -- I want to be successful at work and moving up the ladder has meant I have more work obligations now -- but somehow I have to find a way to balance those and still find ME time. It'll be easier now that we're heading into nicer weather.

Right now I've just started 2 weeks holiday, so there is NO pressure from work -- no excuse not to get back in gear. Except that I'm on vacation - and usually that means going out to eat and sitting around relaxing. Got any ideas how I can still relax and release some stress but still get back to my healthy routine?