Sunday, 11 April 2010

It's a daily choice

These things I do:

I do not weigh or measure my food.

I judge portions using common sense.

I do not count calories or grams of anything.

I write down what I ate and the time I ate it.

I avoid food products containing ingredients no ordinary human would keep in the pantry--I must be able to picture each ingredient in its raw, natural state.

I avoid foods that list any form of sugar in the top three ingredients.

I avoid food products that make health claims on the packaging.

I believe it's not food if it's called the same name in every language (Fritos, Big Mac, Coca-Cola.)

I eat mostly plants, especially leaves.

I eat the rainbow daily.

I drink the spinach water. :)

I eat whole fruits and avoid juices.

I only eat junk food that I made myself.

I serve a proper portion and don't go back for seconds.

I eat meals.

I limit snacks to unprocessed plant foods.

I follow the 'S-Policy': 'No snacks, no sweets, no seconds except on days that start with S.'

These are rules I used to follow. (They're also some of the rules Michael Pollan recommends in his book, Food Rules). Over the last two years, I've slipped out of these good habits to varying degrees, and I've also gained 9 lbs. I weighed 142 lbs this morning. My jeans are tight--too tight to wear to work anymore. I don't like the way I look in my clothes now. I don't really like the way I feel when I eat the way I've been eating, although to be honest I have really enjoyed the food while I'm actually eating it.

I used to have a preachy food and exercise blog I called 'No deadlines, just daily choices.' That's going to be my mantra again. (I had to Google to find that old blog for the link I gave, but if you have the time, browse around in the older posts, like from 2006-7. There's some pretty good stuff in there!)

I'm also going to stop being so complacent about my workouts. I do work out regularly, I work out hard, and I am keeping fit. But I don't ever actually work out until my legs are jello and I'm truly, completely spent. And those are the only kinds of workouts that are going to get me a true training effect. I've got to push myself. I want to push myself. The workouts I'm doing now are the ones that used to really push me 6 years ago. It's not they're too easy now by any means--but I'm not pushing myself hard enough while I do them. I still make modifications when I know by this time I should be just doing it. I sink to the knees if I even start to get uncomfortably tired during push-ups. I don't lunge or squat as deep as I can when the reps start to add up. I take impact out of moves when I know I'm fully capable of doing them, just because I don't want to push myself. In fact, I'm being lazy. What I'm doing is cheating. I've cheated my nutrition AND my workouts--for 2 years!

If I'd been doing my best, by now I could have been ready to run a marathon. I could be wearing a UK size 6 skirt. I could have cut arms, which has always been my dream. I could be doing pull-ups--another fitness dream. I could be flexible enough to do the splits and able to do a backbend--yoga dreams. It's certainly been enough time to accomplish these things. I've just chosen to do the same old workouts at the same old pace and sit on my butt eating bourbon creme biscuits and in my spare time baking cakes and cookies!

Part of me, of course-- my lazy, I-don't-want-to-change side-- wants to just go curl up with a book in one hand and the other in a Doritos bag. Meanwhile the other side finds herself browsing websites for fitness bootcamps in order to blast off this gained weight and get to the level of fitness I dream of at long last. (Then my hey-wait-we-can't-afford-that side wakes up and says, look you, just eat less and work harder and see what you can accomplish for free!)

1 comment:

Anna Down Under said...

You'll get back in your groove, Carla. You've done something amazing just to get the weight off to begin with. And I've lost and regained enough weight in my life to know keeping it off may just be the hardest part. You've inspired people - including me - and I believe you can do whatever you set your mind to.